LISTS

Think about the worst places to lose things.  As if the hope for finding it is not already crushed by the simple act of losing it in the first place.  Places we've all looked but failed, places that are familiar but empty, areas connected to sadness, de ja vous that ends in misery. --If you do stupid things stupid things will happen -- but what comes next?  This is the main thought today after losing the most critical piece of the necklace I recently made. The pendant, a white coral picked off the shores of Aruba when I visited with my parents last December.  I numbly retraced my steps to the bus across the soccer field and parking lot just to complete the motions but not to feel that way.  I've almost lost that necklace before and in the same place too, but with every stroke of luck, every small triumph, comes recklessness, undoubtedly wrapped in confidence.  Fields of grass, sand at the beach, shores... this is the beginning of a list of places, constantly touched by people, moved by nature, never safe to remain still.  They are so common, perhaps unnoticed or maybe unconsciously and aggressively exploited, but despite those interactions are emotionally at peace.  Do the THINGS we lose WANT to be found?

-Pekkle wallet with all my birthday money, Fourth Grade, under pillow in guest room.

-Retainer, High School, trash bin on driveway with pizza boxes.

-"Waffle" of Yummy Breakfast keychain collection series, college third year, condo trash, never found.

-Black ceramic ring with delicate green floral design on inner wall, a few months ago, The Woods in Williamsburg, never found.

-White coral from Aruba slightly resembling a stubby wishbone, today, Fort Tilden beach and pathway, pending.  never found.


journal entry from summer or at least one day that felt like summer, enough to go to the beach